The Temperance Seven



STOPPINGPRESSNEWSBRACHING

Professor Collicot has decided to take a Sabbatical in order to Re-Charge his Battery. He plans to Swim the length of the Mighty Amazon River gathering Specimens on the way to add to his Piranha Collection. To Accommodate this Move, the good Doctor Latham has Agreed to step Backwards two Paces in Time to Man the Grand Jazz Percussion Kit. After having a Quick count up of Heads during this Hiatus, we Discovered to our Astonishment that we were an Extra Man Short! To Overcome this Shortfall we found to our Utter Amazement that under the Treaty of Lisbon 2007 section 8: sub-section 4; biz. (b) para. 3. (belatedly signed by our dear PMGB), we were Compulsory Obliged to employ a Foreign National from within the EEC Membership States!

Murkily, out of the Middle Distance, Appeared two Likely Candidates. The first, a Danish National called Lief Høvis-Hences, a notable Sackbutist, and, one of our Distant Cousins from Gaul - M. Pierre D’Anby, Baronet and Claritone Owner, Bon Oeuf! Bon Viveur!! Bon Mini!!! As with all Prospective New Incumbents, we Adjourn to the Local Hostelry, The Dodgy Kipper and subject them to the Shell-Out Falters Test. At the Pub Door however, the Viking announced that he had left his Wallet at Home. It became Immediately Apparent that our Danish Friend obviously Suffered from an Impediment in his Reach and was sent Packing Forthwith! Over the Threshhold and at the Bar we set the SOF plan into Operation. At a Pre-Arranged Signal the Chaps started Gabbling on about Distant Shores and Faraway Beaches. A look of Complete Bewilderment Appeared on the Face of the Gallic Galloot as he Muttered “What Shores?” Whereupon he was offered the Job Amid a Chorus of “Guinness”, “Large G&T”, “Benylyn and Bitter” etc. etc.

Monsieur Pierre D’Anby

Monsieur Pierre D’Anby

Monsieur Pierre D’Anby comes from a long line of Franco-Prussian Aristocracy. The Two Prussian Families, the Saxa-Coburghers (available at the Co-op, B.O.G.O.F. but a bit on the Salty Side) and the D’Anby-Assile-Burghers, are believed to have Met the Mighty French Family the H’Abiton De Sàde, at a Cocoa Mining Convention in Alsace in 1663. During his Schooling at The Jocelyn Smallboys Academy, Berne, Pierre Ran Away to the Circus and was Fortunate Enough to Meet the Famous “Vent du Merde” Artist “Le Petomaine” who took the young Pierre under his Wise and Caring Wing where he Taught Him all he Knew about Circular Breathing (and the rest. ed.). Pierre is Credited with Teaching the Great Multi-Instrumentalist, Roland Kirk the Technique of playing “Stars and Stripes Forever” whilst Miming on the Saxophone.